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        7. How often do married couples in their 40s make love.

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          Easily one of the most common questions I get in my role as a sex and relationships expert is about sexual frequency.

          “My husband and I only have sex a couple of times a month, is that normal?” or “We have sex once a week, should it be more?” or “We haven’t had sex in 3 months, are we doomed?” It is in our nature as humans to compare ourselves to others as a benchmark for whether or not we’re doing it right.

          However, the answer to all of these questions, despite their variation, is “it depends.”

          Sexual frequency concerns are so common because they’re easy to quantify; it's easier to count how many times you have sex in a given week, month, or year than it is to figure out how often you might feel like having sex.

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          This makes it easy for us to use frequency as a marker of sexual relationship health, even though that can be misleading. Frequency just isn’t the same for everyone and you can’t compare sex lives without considering the context.

          When it comes to sex, there’s really no such thing as “normal.” It can be helpful to ask yourself these thr